I Don't Know...

"I don't know" seems to be my answer lately.

*When are you leaving for Costa Rica?

*When will you be ready to go?

*How will you pay off your debt, again?

*What do you think God is trying to teach you right now?

I don't know.

I had no idea how hard it would be to respond to the many people who thought I'd left already when they say, "Oh, I thought you were in Costa Rica." I had no clue how much it would break my heart to have to say again and again, "No. Not yet."

It's been 2 years since God called me to be a missionary to the men and women in prostitution in San Jose, Costa Rica. 2 years of trying to get ready, pay off debt, arrange the details and raise money and awareness. 2 years!

*So NO, I don't know when I'll be leaving.

In less than 2 years I was able to get out of around $8000 worth of debt. I also was making about $33,000/year. I recently had an emergency tooth extraction, to the tune of $1043. Along with one outstanding loan, that leaves me at $2,615 and my current income is around $16,000/year sans healthcare.

*So NO, I don't know when I'll be out of debt again.

I have currently raised 25% of what I will need to spend a full year in Costa Rica.

*So NO, I don't know when I'll be ready to go.

I was taking a Biblical Counseling class which has since been cancelled. I was really hoping to learn a lot to help with whatever I may face in CR.

*So NO, I don't know what God is trying to teach me right now.

BUT

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare[a] and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11

"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." 2 Peter 3:8

"In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I cried for help. From His temple he heard my voice, and my cry to Him reached His ears." Psalm 18: 6-7

So, I will not doubt in the plan of the Creator.

I will not doubt that He is God and He knows what He is doing.

I will not doubt that He is in control of my situation.

I will not doubt in His calling on my life.

I will pray.

God provide whatever it takes to get me on the mission field.

God lead me to the next goal.

God reveal what you want me to learn. Amen